Recently I scanned through social media and read people’s posts about their long lists of achievements and I was left with the feeling that I had nothing to be proud of and nothing valuable to share.
If I haven’t just made the best cake, gone on the best holiday, won an award for something or ran a personal best than I had nothing to contribute to the world and people would just find me boring… it started to feel like if you are chronically ill than you have nothing to be proud of or to share with the world.
You are useless and very uninteresting… and you most definitely can’t be fun. The more unwell you are it seems as though the less you are interesting or relevant.
Have we really come to this? Is it a competition now to see who has the most interesting personal lives? … I wonder.
After deciding to take some time away from social media I started to feel as though my life was worthy again and that I am in fact an interesting human being; no matter what my health status and my challenges. I started to find my smile again, even in the middle of pain and struggle.
I also noticed that the less you share of your life the less that people feel entitled to make judgement on it or critique you.
It has left me with the very real question of what do I share and what really matters?
I have noticed that my long time friends and the people who reallyknow me have always encouraged me and always valued me, no matter what I was doing or how well I am.
Those that don’t really know me, love me or respect me (or my life) are more likely to take exception, be judgmental, critique me and my choices and don’t really care about what matters to me… They are friends, family and acquaintances in name only.
I have loved my time away from social media and the stream of information, comments and some of the events that have very little to do with me or my quality of life. I.e. Knowing that people are eating laundry liquid or what the current trends are!
I have started to appreciate the little things in my life once again and they have a renewed sense of purpose and peace about them that can not be quantified or compared with other people’s day to day lives.
As I get older I am learning what really matters to me and who really cares. Although I am learning that there are a lot less of both, I feel the richer and wiser for discovering them.
I think a health challenge, or life changing event like that, makes you mature very quickly! It gives you a lot of lessons in a short period of time, and this can make us feel very different from our peers and even those who may be older than us in years. Does all this knowledge have a value? I absolutely believe it does!
Even if it only has value to me.
I will always treasure the love, kindness, encouragement and lessons from those people in my life and those that are no longer in my life. I acknowledge that my life and future is very different from many others out there, but I now also feel it has very real value and I will always be happy and blessed to be able to share my life and love with those who value it too.